Reflections of a year...

       When we stop to think, I think we realize that time is a most interesting phenomenon. When we look back we cannot believe how quickly time has passed and because of this, events just a few days or a couple weeks previous seem like ancient history. At the same time, while in the midst of a day or struggling through a specific moment, time feels like it is passing slower than molasses... these are reflections I often entertain for I find time to be so fascinating. It is because of these reflections that I turn to the last year of my life that has passed both slowly and with great swiftness. I cannot believe about a whole year has passed since graduating from college but at the same time graduation begins to feel like a distant memory. There have been many times since graduation when I have pined for the days of college while in the midst of teaching or living as a missionary for Totus Tuus. At the same time it has been a journey in trust and humility growing into life after college.

       Navigating the waters of bills and finances, travel, loneliness, dreams, success, setbacks, and exhaustion has been an experience unlike any I have had thus far. It has been a time of excitement and potentiality, a time of struggle and anxiety. I think I have really begun to see how necessary it is to keep one's life centered on those things that are unchanging, that are truly dependable. In reality, to keep one's life centered on the center, Jesus Christ. Whenever there is a distraction, a trial, or anything that causes us to take our gaze off of Christ and turn it toward ourselves, we begin to struggle through, we begin to lose focus, and indeed lose sight of our goal because of a willful choice not to look at the goal or center. Of course, this is the opposite of what a Christian strives for in his life, and of course it is simply silly. 

       As I look over the past year, the times in which I was continuously dedicating myself to our Lord, whether or not the circumstances were favorable or if life was 'going well', there was a definite peace. This is the result of centering oneself on the unchanging, for as the world around changes, you can in a sense remain unaffected at least in the most important ways. It is when we begin to trust in our own strength, or to take life for granted, we begin to really struggle with a certain uneasiness. This uneasiness then brings about a certain level of worry because we begin to wonder what it is that is making us feel uneasy, when the answer is very simply, ourselves. 

      The most important lesson I have learned in the past year is the necessity of continuously turning to our Lord in prayer, faithfully, with an ardent act of faith whether or not it is supported by pious feeling. Every action of our lives ought to be pointed toward our heavenly Father, ought to be done with love, but without prayer, one quickly begins to fail in making every act an act of love. We do not contain within ourselves the strength to love as we ought, that strength must come from elsewhere. For when the wind blows strong or the ground feels unsteady beneath our feet, there is an assurance in the peace of Christ, knowing that you are living for Him and striving to make every act an act of love.

       In this Easter season, it is appropriate that these are the sentiments or thoughts that have occupied my heart and my mind. Jesus Christ's most frequent greeting to persons after His resurrection is a simple, profound, and absolutely necessary proclamation, "Peace, be with you."